HOMELY HOMILIES

with drawings by Richard Baxter

A FEW OF YOU have suggested lately that I write down some of these “marvelous deathless words” that I’ve been mouthing for years — words that sound great when they’re said, but start to sound pretty pedantic and pompous when they’re written down.  These stories and homilies represent important ideas that have guided my life.  But maybe their “deathless” quality is more associated with the imagination of the hearer and in the way they are said than in any inherent value in the words themselves.  Like many things you hear or say in the excitement and mystery of the night air, they are often lacking something in the cold light of day or in hard print.  

Nevertheless, I agreed to try, so here is the result.  I can say that the exercise has added to my personal stockpile of humility, as I ask myself — “With all these smart words of wisdom floating around in your head and coming out of your mouth, have you been so great after all?  Have you been as great as these words should have made you?”

AS A YOUNG man — or boy — I remember being much affected by a fine, idealistic layman.  He spoke on the three-sided credo of the Y.M.C.A. — body, mind, and spirit.  He explained eloquently that these three parts of a person had to be developed in roughly equal strength in order to achieve true happiness.  It was an odd source for such an important message, but it stuck with me.  I has helped me to be a better person that I would have been.

This experience started me exercising to make my puny body stronger.  It motivated me to make a more concentrated effort to actually learn from my education.  I  began to expand my vocabulary by noting words, and keeping a list of their meanings by my bedside to review each night.  I began to look into other religions and philosophies, reaching out to people in other ethnic groups, exploring ideas that were different from those my family can with.

Ten years later I volunteered to lead similar classes as a community work.  It was richly rewarding to contribute to the development of these young people.

This whole statement is very general but it leads to a specific homily.  Here is Homely Homily Number I:

~ Don’t neglect any part of yourself, or concentrate on development any one aspect to the detriment of any other.  Strive for balance in your life. ~

IT SEEMS THAT many people respond to life by just accepting what comes to them, or by making only the most obvious choices.  Decisions are usually dictated by economic circumstances.  One must first earn the money to pay for basic necessities before one’s choices can become more personal and selective.  People dream of “winning the lottery”, making a lucky investment, or “striking it rich” — and thereby gaining the luxury of choice.

There is more hope, I think, in another approach, more prosaic and practical.  My father was an artist, not a banker, but he gave me some good advice about banking a long time ago.  He talked to me about the “power of compound interest.”  With a simple mathematical calculation he showed me how, by saving something every year and investing it at compound interest, you would create a pool of capital.  This capital would earn interest, becoming like a “person” with a separate “salary.”  Eventually this pool of capital would earn enough to work on your behalf, giving you freedom from necessity, and the opportunity of real choice.

My father’s advice was some of the best, and most memorable, that I have every received.  And so I am passing it on, in Homely Homily Number II”

~ Save a little every year and put it out to work for you.  Let it grow, and eventually it will give you freedom from the tyranny of necessity. ~

I’VE LONG HAD THE feeling that (contrary to what you hear) none of us are born equal.  At least we don’t really start out in equal circumstances.

We are given certain physiques and physical capacities.  We are born into different economic levels, in various countries.  We inherit different attitudes and values.

For example, the physical body you begin with is affected by diet, exercise, sleep, training, moderation, or excess.  When I was young I was small, insignificant, and even puny.  I felt sorry for myself.  I had no chance.  Then I saw an advertisement in a cheap pulp magazine:  “How to Build a Mighty Body.”  I sent away a very hard-earned dollar for the course.  From this came a daily habit of morning exercise, and a planned regiment that helped me to make the best out of the body I’d been given.  This success helped change my attitude, and having a strong and healthy body certainly improved my live.

We all start with what we are given, and each one of us has an opportunity to change and improve, to make whatever we can out of the raw material we have.  We will all face different levels of difficulty in the process.  Some people approach the unequal point of beginning with resentment.  I believe this must be avoided at all costs.  It only makes the task harder, the inequalities divisive.

So here is Homely Homily III:

~ Don’t resent inequalities.  Make the most of what you have.  Get on with it, with a smile and with style! ~

ONE OF THE BEST pieces of advice I ever received came to me from a book written by Henry Hoke, an expert in direct mail advertising.  He said that in order to understand people better you have to get out of your own milieu.  You have to approach other people in their environments, and learn what they are doing, thinking, and believing.

Hoke suggested, for example, that we find out about other religions.  Visit churches, synagogues, and temples.  Sit at the back, quietly and respectfully.  Watch and feel what is happening, and how the adherents respond.  Go to meetings of various movements. Don’t get caught up in them, but listen respectfully.  Think about what they have to say, and learn.

It’s something I did a lot of in my formative years, and it taught me much about accepting others.  It gave me the understanding that there is many more than one road to a complete life.

Homely Homily IV:

~ Try to learn about other people’s ideas, philosophies, and thoughts.  You will understand them better, and learn more about yourself. ~

I’M NOT QUITE SURE who it was who first taught me a great learning technique that takes very little time away from a busy daily schedule.  It could have been a combination of people, including my mother, a young but crotchety junior high-school teacher, and a special university professor.  It doesn’t matter really where it came from — it has served me well over many years.

If you want to learn something or memorize something, do a little every day.  Make notes of key points, and put it on a piece of paper beside your bed.  Read it over just before you turn out the light to go to sleep.  Concentrate and think, then give yourself a little test.  You’ll be surprised how naturally you will absorb the knowledge organized in that format.  It soon becomes part of your personal pool of knowledge, to which it becomes increasingly easy to add.  By this method I was able to memorize lengthy quotes, widen my vocabulary, memorize complex business sales pitches so that they flowed naturally from my tongue the next day, learn all about irregular French verbs, and become reasonably fluent in French.

Homely Homily Number V:

~ Don’t be intimidated by what you don’t know.  If you want to learn something that is large and frighteningly formidable, break it down into small parts, and learn a little bit every day. ~

THERE IS MUCH HAPPINESS in being the best of whatever you are, or in doing the very best job you can possibly do, and knowing it.

I have found people that are happy and well-adjusted in all walks of life.  Often, in talking with them, I’ve found that the basis for their happiness is that they are good at what they do.  No matter what their job, they feel that “nobody can do it better.”  This give people a feeling of security and contentment.

On the other hand, some people can carry the pursuit of a specialty too far, and ignore the need to develop a balance.  So don’t go overboard by excluding the other sides of self-development!  Be prudent, and don’t ignore either mind, body, or spirit.

When I was in high school times were tough and jobs were scarce.  I figured that if I wanted a job on graduation I had to win the Governor General’s Medal.  This medal was given to the best “all-round” graduates — good marks, active socially and with extracurricular things, good at sports.  I looked at myself and said “your weakness is sports.”  I couldn’t make any teams.  It was bad.  But I found that almost nobody did the shot-put.  So I tried it, read about it, watched movies on it.  I practiced and practiced until I became an expert.  At the meet I won the event and actually set a record!  I won the Governor General’s Medal.

Homely Homily VI:

~ Try to be the best at whatever you are doing.  It’s a good road to happiness. ~

I FORGET THE name of the philosopher who said “Every day, in every way, I try to get better and better” — or something like that!

Long ago I read this and though about it.  Then I read an article by a businessman who said something akin to “You always start dumb.  Everyone begins as a rookie.  The people who get somewhere are the ones who stick with it, adding something to their knowledge every day, and keeping it there.  Those who do it best end up smart.”

I combined these two ideas from vastly different sources and decided that at the end of each day I’d pause, and reflect honestly on what I’d done that day, and what I could learn from it.  I used to call it (to myself) my “daily talk with God.”  In this way I would make an honest appraisal of how I could improve.

This leads to Homely Homily Number VII:

~ Pause on some regular basis and face what you are doing.  Honestly reflect on how you are improving and how you can improve.  Look at how you have progressed towards the achievement of your personal life goals. ~

SO THERE THEY ARE . . . .some homely homilies to consider.  And they haven’t touched upon the greatest things that come to you through loyalty — loyalty to the important things in life, like your antecedent, your loves, your loved ones, your friends, and your beliefs.

Homely homilies or not, I’ve been very lucky.  I got to marry the only woman that could have taken me for what I am and let me be what I must be.  We have enjoyed a beautiful life, and a growing friendship that expands every day.  We gave birth to you six beautiful children, now adults who are different, interesting, vital people.  You have passed through the dependency of the very young, the rebelliousness of youth, to a maturity of love and friendship.

Who could ask for anything more?  The homely homilies may be pedantic and pedestrian, but if they have helped to make me so lucky then I’d better believe they’ve been good for me.

KING HOMELY OF THE HOMILIES DEALS WITH THE INEVITABILITY OF TIDE WITH HIS MOST SPECTACULAR HOMILY OF ALL:

“ TO HAVE DONE YOUR BEST, TO HAVE TRIED AND FAILED, IS BETTER THAN TO HAVE NEVER TRIED AT ALL” 

I MAY BE BORING BUT LOOK AT KING CANUTE HE IS REMEMBERED BY HISTORY.